4 Tactics a Strong Women Never Use To Get a Man’s Attention
Strong women keep themselves in check when it comes to interacting in a healthy way with their partners. Four behaviors, in particular, can easily drive a man away, and they can drive away other people in a woman’s life as well. The following behaviors are attention-seeking, and they have no place in harmonious relationships. Try to avoid these behaviors in order to facilitate a strong relationship.
Emotional Outbursts
Some women will let a situation build up until she has what is known as an emotional outburst. Crying, shouting, and throwing things can easily send a significant another packing. Psychologists refer to outbursts as displaced aggression, and these dramatic shows of emotion can destroy a feeling of safety within a relationship. Marni Battista, a dating coach, says that emotional outbursts reduce a woman to an adolescent-type mindset. This drama can drive away a partner who may wish to distance himself from such behavior. Research notes that instead of letting situations build up until you feel as if you need to have an outburst, it may be better to address smaller issues as they arise. Other tactics include distracting oneself until angry feelings have dissipated.
Sulking
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Sulking is a manipulative way to react to not getting your way. When your partner doesn’t do something that you want them to, it is best not to pout or sulk in an effort to guilt him into giving you your way.
This is an attempt to control your partner, and it may certainly drive them away. Additionally, obsessive thinking about a situation can lower your sense of self-esteem, and it may even lead to depression. As long as your safety isn’t threatened, it is healthier for all parties involved if you simply accept things the way they are.
Ignoring
David Schroeder, a licensed social worker, states that ignoring a loved one, otherwise known as “giving the cold shoulder,” is passive-aggressive and will create a feeling of disconnect between you and your significant other. Ignoring someone also has painful consequences. Paul Schrodt, Ph.D., is a professor of communication studies. He recently reviewed over 70 studies which involving thousands of participants and found that ignoring another person is very damaging. In fact, ignoring a person activates the same areas of his or her brain as physical pain does. Unfortunately, this is one of the most common problems in marriage and relationships.
Complaining About Your Partner
Active complaining about a situation without trying to find a solution does not help any relationship. The same can be said about complaining about your partner to your friends. When you complain about your relationship, you may simply be trying to get validation from other people rather than actively working on your relationship. Complaining about your partner can further widen any distance between the two of you. Furthermore, if your partner hears about your complaints through the grapevine, then he may feel as if you have betrayed his confidence. Guy Winch, Ph.D., and author of The Squeaky Wheel blog states that complaining is ineffective, as it often does not result in a positive outcome.
In conclusion, discussing things in a mature way with your partner is much more effective than trying to control him with damaging tactics. Do not be afraid to speak to your partner about your feelings. Most likely, he will appreciate your efforts.