How to Act If Your Guy Is Flirting With Your Best Friend
You get that empty feeling in the pit of your stomach every time your guy is flirting with your best friend. Could it be your instincts warning you or your jealousy tricking you? Well, if it is those natural instincts dropping hints, what exactly should you do? Pretend you’ve seen nothing, know nothing? Point and scream ridiculously right in the middle of the flirtatious act? Before you become irrational there are some practical and simple actions to take when you suspect your friend and hunk are being extra friendly.
Facts Over FeelingsBefore the necessary confrontation, first decide if there is anything to even confront. Maybe you know your best friend to commonly flirt with every smiling male face she encounters. Therefore, you automatically think she is flirting with yours. Maybe your guy is just trying to be friendly and make sure she doesn’t feel left out. You want to take into consideration that men and women can be naturally flirtatious, not meaning to cause harm or deceit.
So, take a day to evaluate your man, your friend, and yourself before concluding an undesirable situation. You don’t want to address something you may have made up in your head, so make sure what you have seen, heard, and felt are valid.
Ok Mister, You’ve Got Some Explaining To DoNow that you have carefully decided that you aren’t overreacting, it’s time to address how their behavior has made you feel. You want to approach this with each of them privately. The order in which you speak to them doesn’t matter much, as both relationships are important and both individuals are involved. I would start wherever you feel most comfortable. At this point you want to have solid details about their interactions. What made you uncomfortable initially? What continuous actions led you to feel uneasy?
This stage of confronting your feelings may cause you to feel nervous, tense, and even awkward. This is normal but keep your head clear and stand confidently!
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One Down, One to GoRemember, this is your best friend. Someone you know well enough and feel comfortable enough to bring around your partner. You don’t want to beat around the bush nor do you want to come off as offensive or threatening. You know how to communicate with her.
Try to be as open as possible, expressing clearly how you feel, and be sure not to downplay your emotions. Again, this is your friend. Be careful that you don’t treat her as your child or student. If she reacts defensively, assure her you are not attacking her but simply bringing to her attention how you feel.
What’s the Verdict?Hard part’s over! The other 2 stooges are now aware of your feelings and their behavior. All you have to do now is see if anything changes; and hopefully knowing them, the changes will be immediate and noticeable. Go out a few more times and watch the interactions. You certainly don’t want to be obvious or be on a “flirt-alert.”
Be casual, as you typically are and watch out for any of those “gutsy” feelings. Make sure they are not being awkward and still maintaining a friendly amount of interaction; although you shouldn’t be surprised to see this reduced. Once the atmosphere is tension-free, take the first round of drinks!
Live Happily Ever AfterAfter the ill feelings are gone, don’t look back. Don’t bring this up in arguments, don’t look for them to make mistakes, don’t hold a single thing against them. You have effectively resolved any possible issues that could’ve surfaced and now you have to effectively move on!
Sometimes you cannot ignore what you feel. Sometimes you have to face the ugly truth. It is okay to feel afraid and uncertain, as long as that does not keep you from what you are trying to accomplish. Now your relationships are still healthy, and even stronger!
